If you gotta go.....

I have wanted to share my thoughts on the Chinese Bathroom situation for awhile because the toilets in China are almost as shocking as being fondled by a Chinese Masseuse!

When I found out China was my first International Destination I went to work trying to figure out how I would survive in their culture.  I had fears that the bathroom situation would be scary, and as I found  pictures on the Internet of the toilets all my fears were confirmed and became 100 times greater!!!!

Now lets get real......  (I am writing this while J was in Europe so censorship need not apply)

I have had four children!!!  I am a healthy girl and drink up to a gallon of water a day.  With that said the bathroom situations for me are important!!!!  I have to go a lot and there isn't many bathrooms I haven't visited.  I am a great friend to take to the bathroom because I am usually headed there anyways and know where they all are.  I am not a great friend to travel with in a vehicle caravan because I want to stop every hour to see how the bathrooms are doing in each city.

I am lucky because the business we are in requires J to check in on convenience stores.  He doesn't complain when I ask him to stop because he sees it as an opportunity to do a little work.  I literally have a friend who will not drive with us because a six hour trip has the potential to become much longer depending on how many people in our car are consuming beverages.  If I play my cards right, I can get a different kid to need to go to the bathroom in every city along the way, which helps it not look like its always me!!!

So back to China....

I knew I would use bathrooms every place we went and I tried to prepare for all situations.   I packed my own wet wipe toilet paper, hand sanitizer, and toilet seat covers just in case.  I practiced standing up at home a few weeks prior to strengthen leg muscles (OK, I didn't really do this, but it sounds good)... and I researched how to best use their toilets without peeing all over my own feet!

Within minutes of landing in Beijing, I headed to the bathroom for my first experience with the toilets  in the ground.  I have to say I really do like the fact that you don't touch anything.  There is no seat to try to cover and no handle to flush, but there is a great splashing effect that goes on while standing!  This causes the area where your feet are to go, to be less than desirable!!!

I conquered the airport bathroom with little to no complications and really thought this whole bathroom thing wasn't going to be as bad as I predicted.

Detour:  

While I was in the bathroom at the airport, J was looking for a taxi.  Now he hates lines and was hesitating getting in an extremely long one when a Chinese man approached him to drive us to our hotel.   I knew nothing about this practice of random people at the airport that will act as a taxi to take you to your destinations before our arrival.  I learned they may also take your money, your luggage, and not take you to your destination.

Looking back J confirms he knew it was not a good idea to agree to the random Chinese Fake Taxi Driver.  He didn't want to wait in the line, and he knew he was much bigger than the Chinese man so he decided to take a chance!!!

Get out!!!! Did you just read that??????

He decided to take a chance with me, the girl who's afraid to do anything adventurous, and agreed to go to CHINA!!!  Not sure how he thought it was a good idea for the first thing he does with me overseas to be risky!!! He lead me through a parking garage with a random Chinese man!!!  Bad Idea..... I want to live, I have 4 children who need their mother!!!
And I get he is a big guy, but maybe the small guy has big friends or big guns!!!

So....

Not to worry, before we got to the Chinese mans car, 3 other men came running at us which caused our Fake Taxi Driver to throw our bags in the street to block them and run as fast as he could to try to get away from the men chasing him!!!!  I didn't even grasp what was happening until it was all over and J proceeded to explain to me how you are not supposed to go in random taxis.... We headed to the taxi line which we used the rest of our trip, but damage was done!!  In my own mind  our fake taxi driver was kidnapped and beaten, and we barely escaped kidnapping ourselves.  I have no idea what was behind the whole thing,  gambling debts or territory wars but what I do know is that our fake taxi driver was not having a great day, and I nearly joined him!!

Back to toilets....

The lid lifted up as you walk in the room, So Cool!

I visited a lot of them in China.  Most were disgusting, but I still liked that I really didn't have to touch anything.  I was prepared with my own arsenal of cleaning supplies so it really went, pretty well.  By the end I mastered how far to spread your feet to avoid backsplash, and to put down wet wipes in previous backsplash situations to preserve the bottom of my shoes!

My favorite, and I'm not kidding, favorite toilets ever were in Tokyo, Japan.  (yes I have favorite toilets) They were normal US toilets but the really, fancy, upgraded kind.  As soon as you walked in the bathroom running water sounds started and the lid manually lifted.  I hate the idea that people can hear each other in the bathroom and this running water sound solves the problem completely!!  I think about them often when in a bathroom and running water to muffle any sounds someone might hear.....  I know I have issues!



So Tips for International Bathrooms:

Take your own supplies!
-wet wipes
-toilet seat covers
-hand sanitizer
-some spare change because some bathrooms require money
-rain boots  (if you're in China and can't squat this may be a necessity for you :)

Next time I bringing one of these!!  Peeing standing up made a whole lot easier!
Found on your local Amazon Website.

I think someday I am going to start a Yellow Hat Club.  I know that at any given time, one Mom or another is laughing, jumping, exercising, running, or just breathing and accidents happen.  Oh the joys of childbirth!!!! (PS this can be fixed and I did and its the best thing ever!!)

I usually avoid the talk of toilets,  but like laundry I find it fascinating how different things can be done in other countries...... Because in all places If you gotta go, you gotta go!!

PS:   Do Not Get into any Taxis that are not the result of standing in a long line, or ordered by your hotel.  (Several times while waiting in line we saw these Random Fake Taxi Drivers chased by actual uniformed Police and some arrested.  As soon as the police would leave they would be back and I just wanted to run around telling all the people leaving with them not to get in their cars.  It is a huge problem and so scary!!)

And bring the address of your destination in their language!  If you bring it in English they will stare at you in confusion when you ask to be taken to the Marriott.  (Once at the hotel, you can get a card from the front desk to hand to taxis to get back to the hotel, they are quite handy)

Last Side Note:  I read and reread my stories over and over to try to simplify my sentences and not use so many commas and run ons.  Unfortunately, I want these stories to read just as I would say them so I can't modify them to much.  Try to use my voice and really understand that a lot of exclamation marks means I'm Serious!!!  Thanks for reading, I really love writing!!